Energy

I dont know when I stopped reading my OSHO Books but today when i was thinking about a few of them, this is what I got reminded of --

There was person in one of the sessions who asked a Question --"I have a feeling i am storing everything inside myself, i am closed and locked. I just feel I am holding myself together inside. I cant flow".

We sometimes have tendencies to either hold the energy too much inside-- i.e: in control or do excessive flow which becomes destructive. It is very important to channelise your energies. Some people go in extermities and keep flipping back and forth and not accepting the fact we need to work with both the energies seamlessly and choicelessly and not thrust upon ourselves either of the options especially out of circumstances. Authentic is usually confused as overflowing and not keeping a check, these energies to flow, and to let it happen naturally.
I recently felt that if you keep trying, everytime trying and nothing happens. This is when your energy is flowing in one direction and you are forcing ureself to move in the other direction.
Another important channelsing not to keep repeating the wrong words like " iam holding" " its not working out" it will itself lead to contradiction of what you want. By making contradiction ( which i do most of the times)it lead to being half in place and missing the centre of the energy as you are doing it half hearted and in doubt and questioning your own energy.

What I have realised ( not implemented) is to trust your own energy and flow with it. At times the leakage of the energy happens when one begins to think " this is all a waste, this relationship is a waste". Eventually it is important to know the centre always throws to back to periphery and periphery back to the centre. Maybe it all about the energy and sometimes it is important to put yourself aside.