Very Interesting conversation, before XXY puts up this one on own blog ( which I accidently during the heated discussion suggested), I am gonna be the go getter.
Me- $$*U&DSD I called & u hung up on me- &*($)#UHJ( and put me on Smart mail
XYY- No No dont mis understand
Me- $^%(#&%$^#
XXY- Why are u reacting, what did u eat today ( jokingly with winkie smile)
Me- U $&#*(@ I had PETTI APPAM
XXY- What ?? BETTI APPAM
Me- No PETTI APPAM
XXY- What ETTI APPAM or what ETTI BUM..Now Bums ..pause ...here also
ME - Are u kidding me -- ITS PETTI APPAM-- U %&E&#&@
XXY- APPAM I understand whats this Appam, Bum ..hehehe!!
Me- What crap, you are a Madrasi and still u dont understand this word
XXY- What now all South Indians are Madrasis, I am not a Madrasi madam.. How am I supposed to know this Appam?
Me- Hello you have been eating Appams since you are a kid, only been a few years you've been out & you dont remember
XXY- So how does that matter
Me- &%*%($ dammit its PETTI APPAM
XXY- what TATTI APPAM, now u are having TATTI ( actual faeces/shit/crap) APPAM.
Me- %&%*%* what do u mean I am having TATTI ( faeces), are you crazy, its bullshit crap
XXY- Thats what you have been saying all this while TATTI APPAM
Me- ITS PETTI APPAM
XXY- hehehehehehehhehhehehehhe
Me- &%&&%&%
Ironically Please note -- due to conversations of similar nature some bits might have been fragmented & interwindled.
Showing posts with label Just for Kicks. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Just for Kicks. Show all posts
Friday, July 30, 2010
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Just for Kicks-Disorder in American Courts
These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.
Disclaimer: Please read at your own risk. :))...:))
****ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks
***ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot
***ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan
***ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
WITNESS: We both do.
ATTORNEY: Voodoo?
WITNESS: We do.
ATTORNEY: You do?
WITNESS: Yes, voodoo
***ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-one-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty-one
**ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: You're kidding me, right
***ATTORNEY: She had three children, is that correct?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?WITNESS: Are you shitt'in me? Your Honor, I think I need a differentattorney. Can I get a new attorney?
**ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Now whose death do you suppose terminated it
***ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Guess
**ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice, which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work
**ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on deadpeople?WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people. Would you like torephrase that question
**ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Huh....are you qualified to ask that question
**ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?WITNESS: Oral
**ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m..
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing anautopsy on him
**ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, hedoesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam
And the best for last: ---****ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for apulse?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you beganthe autopsy?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?WITNESS: Yes, he could have been alive and practicing law.*
Disclaimer: Please read at your own risk. :))...:))
****ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks
***ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot
***ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan
***ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
WITNESS: We both do.
ATTORNEY: Voodoo?
WITNESS: We do.
ATTORNEY: You do?
WITNESS: Yes, voodoo
***ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-one-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty-one
**ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: You're kidding me, right
***ATTORNEY: She had three children, is that correct?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?WITNESS: Are you shitt'in me? Your Honor, I think I need a differentattorney. Can I get a new attorney?
**ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Now whose death do you suppose terminated it
***ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Guess
**ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice, which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work
**ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on deadpeople?WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people. Would you like torephrase that question
**ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Huh....are you qualified to ask that question
**ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?WITNESS: Oral
**ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m..
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing anautopsy on him
**ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, hedoesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam
And the best for last: ---****ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for apulse?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you beganthe autopsy?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?WITNESS: Yes, he could have been alive and practicing law.*
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