I sought to learn. It was the self I wanted to free myself & overcome. I wasnot able to overcome it, I could only decieve it, flee from it & hide from it. There is nothing in this world I know less about than myself.That I know nothing about myself, that has remained alien and unkown to me,stems caused from one cause to one single cause:
A cause:I am afraid of myself, I am & was fleeing from myself.I searched and searched,I was dissecting myself, brutually peeling of the layers to find the core of each peel, each entity, a part.I have lost myself in that process.
Long dreams flowed from high to toe. Like the flowing water with all tides & their breath.
No longer do i begin my thoughts & life - looking beyond and the suffering of the self, u & the world.I donot want to kill & dissect myself any longer, to find the secret of the ruins. Neither the Vedas, nor the atma, nor any teachings of search teach no more. I want learn of myself , want to be a student, want to know myself,the secret of me.The secret of Siddartha.
Siddartha-Purpose & essence is not behind the things, they are in them, within them.
How deaf & Stupid I have been !! Mara & Maya
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