Finding Neverland- Wonderland

This is one of the most beautiful pictures I have seen in a really long time. The reason why I copied it, is to precisely describe the essence of this picture

It gave me feeling of being in the Land of Narnias-something like straight from the fairyland, in some ways it seems to be beautiful painting in the olden times in America wherein the Red Indians resided. It makes me feel life is all about flowing and letting go ( which by far has been the most difficult thing for me).

The beauty of the picture is that every single object - talks for itself has so much life in it. The colors and entanglement of the roots,the light falling on certain angles, the path of the water flow, different colors of the leaves, every root has a different twist -like fate

A bridge which reminds me we are all here to bridge bonds no matter entangled they might be cos just like the water it all free flowing.

Completely mesmerised !!

Little Boy

I read this on someone's blog, I found this touching so I thought it best to put up here too.....

This is a true story which happened in the States. A man came out of his home to admire his new truck. To his puzzlement, his three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint of the truck. The man ran to his son, knocked him away, hammered the little boy's hands into pulp as punishment. When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital.

Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands. When the boy woke up from the surgery & saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, "Daddy, I'm sorry about your truck." Then he asked, "but when are my fingers going to grow back?" The father went home & committed suicide.

Think about this story the next time someone steps on your feet or u wish to take revenge. Think first before u lose your patience with someone u love. Trucks can be repaired.. Broken bones & hurt feelings often can't. Too often we fail to recognize the difference between the person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge.

People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever

My- Nu Shu

My-Nu Shu --Titli

Titli (Butterfly)woke up early at 5:30 am, thinking about the lost time she had to make up for the presentation scheduled post-lunch. She hurriedly started working and was all set to go for work by 9 am.
Post- lunch the presentation went well, she was applauded for the first time by her new boss.
Titli thought "Oh a wonderful day, i also got my first appreciation letter".
She went back to her desk to meet her colleagues, but there was stink of jealousy & ignorance from everyone even from her so called "budd-friends".
Titli thought " Why are my friends ignoring me instead of sharing my happiness, no one is now even talking to me"
She went back to her desk to call her parents, but then again there was stink of ignorance & irrelevance.
Titli thought " why are my parents always unhappy with me no matter what I achieve".
She was very disappointed, there was no-body she could talk & understand her.
Titli thought " I am not going to cry today, not at all it is my day and I have earned it, neither will I talk to myself in the mirror"
She boarded the work bus back for her apartment, she had tears in her eyes but was holding back as she had promised to herself to be happy. Walking back to her apartment she saw the old woman who has been begging for months near the lane. The old-woman was abandoned and no-one knew wher she came from.
Like everyday Titli dropped the one rupee coin in the old-woman's bowl and for the first time the old-woman spoke and said--" Khush raho ( Always be happy)".
Titli walked away still with the tears sitting on the edge in her eyes, suddenly she re-called that everyone says the old-woman is deaf and dumb.
She quickly paced back to the old-woman, squatted on the lane and looked at the old-woman in the face and held her hand.
Titli said " Amma, tum bol sakti ho, sun sakti ho" ( Amma, u can talk and hear).
Old-Woman just nodded her head.
Titli said " Amma, fir tum bolti kyon nahi ho, sab ko lagta hai ki tum behari aur goongi ho" ( amma, then why dont you talk, everyone thinks your are deaf and dumb)
Old-woman again just nodded her head.
Titli still with tears on the edge making sure they donot fall said " Amma fir aaj kyon boli tum" (Amma, why did u talk today)
Old woman said " Beti kyonki aaj tumne paach rupiya ka sikha diya and poori do rotiyan bhi, par fir bhi tum roz ki tarah mujhe--- apna "ello" nahi kaha, tum bhi mujhe bhul gayi"( Beti, becos today you gave me 5 rupees and two rotis, but u didnot greet me, I thought you also forgot me).
Titli with tears flowing on her cheeks said- " Amma, I am lonely, no one needs me, my parents,friends, my boyfriend everyone ignores me no-one cares for me, they have there own worlds and I fit in no-where in theirs, they dont even have time or interest in living with me,
no one to share even my happiness, let aside my sorrows. I am very lonely and empty and worst no one sees it. '
Tilti was endlessly crying on the lane in front of the old-woman with a bowl. Suddenly she realised after a few mintues where she was sitting, and lifted her head
facing the Old-woman who was in tears saying " Beti, sab theek ho jayega, sab yahin is sansar mein hai ( everything will be okk, everything is here in this world .
Titli walked back to her apartment and first time in days together slept off without talking to herself and reading about Nu Shu.
In the next apartment, a little girl of 9 years who heard and saw the incident thought " Why are people unhappy, why do people stop valuing the person they love the most, why do we stop loving and giving as we grow old". " Here who was worse- the smart Titli Aunti or Quiet old- Amma".
She again got back to reading about Nu Shu in her bed.

I am Real - Really !!!

I am Real

" What is real" asked the Velveteen Rabbit one day, when Hobbyhorse & Velveteen Rabbit were lying side by side, before Nana came to tidy up the room. "Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick -out handle?
" Real isnt how you are made up " said the Skin Hobby Horse." Its something that happens to you".When a child loves you for long , long time, not just play with you, but really loves you then you become real".

"Does it hurt", asked the Rabbit.

"Sometimes" said the Skin Horse, as he was always truthful.When you are real, you dont mind being hurt.
"it doesnt happen all at once", said the Skin Horse.

"You become real, it takes long time. That's why it doesnt happen to people who break, or have sharp edges, or have carefully kept their treasure of self & love. Generally by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out, you can be shabby & maybe penniless by then. But things dont matter at all, because once you are real, you cannot be ugly at all,except to people who dont understand

I am Real... Thought the Velveteen rabbit and So did I :)

Sptunik- Art of conversation

'Sptunik'

Cece (in his mind- Lost in his thoughts)- hello, How are u?

Fifi- ( in her thoughts, upset & sad)- I am very good, absolutely fine. How about you Cece?

Cece- ( upset over being sacked from company)- Oh, I am doing fantastic, great life.

Well this is what is usually our mode of conversation, our practiced art of conversation in our dayto day life. We as a practice tend to talk more & hardly communicate, hardly do we believe in effective listening.

I clearly recall my confession within ( not publicly) of being talktative ( though 100 % non communicative) &bad listener (though understanding ;)). Having feeling this over and over again of non communicative and faltu (aimless) talk at work & home.I decided to work late in my office to avoid "faltu talk syndrome" caught on me all these years, i felt wonderful. But again it made me more upset & sad as I dint have a single soul to converse in this ever growing population of friends & acquitance list.Finally i did meet somebody with whom I felt I could effectively converse, but i guess i failed miserably in effective listening & negative talk section.

Interestingly, it makes me feel we all are as chartacers of a story we struggle to connect but sometimes we just stop communicating with our own self.Like Sptunik we remain lonely despite the endless chit chat & talking all around.It becomes simultaneosuly mundane, disturbing where everything is a cockpit of losing of identity ,complete isolation & alienation despite Talk-people around. Sad but this is what most people feel in today's borrowed world of so called "Conversation" leading to epitome of loneliness.

The very essence of conversation is "Relationship"-- which is with the subject or person or idealogy or comapnionship or actually mutual exchange of ideas. I guess in private conversations we lose the essence of " relationship" which is again seperating discussion( confronting a certain point as right or wrong) from conversation ( to learn/connect about others their opinion,expereinces, nature etc.) i.e: building trust. I dont remember meeting anyone in a long time who considers an indiviual a fascinating human being- who is prone to making mistakes yet we in our chains of ego keep letting go the beautiful moments.

Considering the current realm its important to be a good listener- it means not hearing but effective listening, which means giving to others emotionally. Avoid interrupting ( i am saying this to myself),dont anticipatethe discussion to end so u can make ure point, not to make sharp reply else it makes the person defensive, no fighting, confrontation. Really important to understand :) & build environment of trust.Most important in towards world we make

Conversation as reason to escape from reality. Negative talks are a strict no no...:), sometimes all it takes it saying sorry and letting go off the ego. Its eventually the relationship which has to be the core & thus win than the indiviualstic ego.

Conversation is a tool of creation; it pulls us out of isolation, builds connections & strengthens our connection with the beautiful people who are a part of our lives and expands our world.

Tippy Tippy Tap- Which color do you want

Tippy Tippy Tap

I was trying to understand the concepts explained by My Chemistry teacher in XII standard sitting on the first seat of the first row when i was all of 16. On the extreme end were Richa & Khyobeni sitting also on the first seat,staring blankly at the blackboard. P.S: naughty & weak students were made to sit on the first seat.Suddenly i turned my head to the left to stare at the window panes, Richa & khyobeni turned their heads right & for no reason we started smiling & laughing. Our Chemistry teacher noted this laughter session between the rows & scolded us. But as they say never say never mind- the laughter sessions along with the package of scolding& being thrown out of the classroom continued till the end of the year.

It reminds of also of my distant cousin Rani who was my friend too when I used to visit my village. Of all the fun i had of bathing in the river canal,of trying to run in the maize fields,smelling & touching the yellow flowers in the fields, of talking secretly about some boy, staring at the stars in the night,drinking lassi from the brass tumbler, trying hold the horns of the buffalo, running around after the hens & the chickens, of teaching her & others tippy tippy tap etc. etc.

These memories struck me when I got in touch with Richa after years together possibly a decade. O' how much I miss all of my care + free days & classmates whom I have known since i was 3 1/2 years old till i was 17. Childhood days were fun.There was happiness,laughter, child-like or kiddish innocene,trust,freedom from thought or what will happen next. We just laughed our hearts out with any pain or remorse or recalling any pain.

Happiness cos of the freedom of not looking beyond the current. Infact had no clue about these hi-fi words as mentioned.

Where are the carefree roads of happiness !!!

That is the land of lost content

I see it shining plain,

The happy highways where I went

And cannot come again.
But again I sometimes feel the openess & happiness of childhood still calling-
Come on people move

For I (childhood) is calling

time to get up and groove

there is no time for stalling

your life has just begun

Inner Voice 1- Healing Centre

Hope trust - Healing Centre

This article is based on my interaction with a Person-A & very close to me currently in the Healing Centre- A drug Rehabilition Centre & some research.

Person 1
A 29 year old, a reserved gentleman, a brown sugar drug addict since the age of 21. Intially took drugs for fun, gradually got addicted to it. Due to drug addiction he wasnt able to graduate. He fellow friends moved on with their lives.He cannot recover from the damage caused to his life due to addiction. Its been 2 weeks he has been in the rehab, he still feels aimless.

Person 2
A 30-35 year old, married with a child. A drug addict, his history- Broken Love, his version his hopes, dreams died eversince he was forced to marry elsewhere. Now a loner, very reserved, was forcibly left at the rehab he has no aim and no intention to survive or live.

Person 3
A 19 year old student pursuing engineering from a top-notch engineering college. Tried drugs for fun, got addicted , his parents realized his early symptoms and today in some days he will be going home.

Unlike the above three, Person 4- A 23 year old, only child of a rich businessman died due to brain haemorrage due to drug overdose, he too felt he led an aimless life. Sad but true !!

Interestingly most the people at the healing centres are indiviuals who feel or felt majorly dejected, stresses, lonely at various phases of life. On meeting the family members of Person -A, i felt grief, in the real sense addiction is a family disease.

I have seen his parents cry, curse themselves, feeling guilty all the time, sucidical tendency. In short -very de-stable.The family memebers of the addicts go through an emotional roller coaster which is never ending.
As the problem increased of the addicts the family becomes more emotionally ill, suppressed, isolated, having sucidial tendency.The family members experience- Guilt, shame, grief, anger,denial, low self worth,humiliated, terrible loneliness.

Person A is currently in The Healing Centre- has special therapy sessions & various communication courses. These courses focus on making the indiviual- share experiences, find out root problems, improve on self worth,be acceptable to self& the world,disciplined ( not to take life and people for granted).

Along with the therapy sessions of the indiviual there are certain counseling sessions, pshyco-therapy sessions, family therapy sessions too. There are certain detox processes involved in the healing process- all of which have withdrawal symptoms- it is quite shocking to see an indiviual in that stage.although the detox stages are notably maintained specifically but it is the emotional detox which is the most difficult as it takes considerable to chnage the emotional health of a person.
Person A is currently in a long term treatment course, this can vary from 4-5 months to mor than a year depending on the healing up stage of the person.

What i found by interaction & reserach is - these treatment sessions focus on examine damaged emotional state, re-build self worth, self belief & concepts, adaptability to living again in the external environment,ability & strength to face the world again, behaviorial patterns, interaction with others & accept oneself.

During the initial of the course it is required to be determine the extend of the addiction of the indiviual based on which certain therpaies & counseling sessions are formed. This is again important as this is very delicate & the indiviual is very defensive.The recovery procedure at the Healing Centre is to unlearn a habit,to willing work out a solution, Recovery it is to be stable in one's life long after the treatment too.
Another fact Person A has been in the Healing Centre for the third time. I alway pray I see the same Person A whom i knew eversince i was a kid.

Sometimes I really think, there have been various stages in our lives when we feel worth less & seek a helping hand. This could be due to a drug problem or emotional problem, In fact we all need is a HEALING TOUCH- Ek pyar ki jhappi !!

Phoneix

Every day I die but I am born to be reborn the next moment
Cos the ashes of my existence is the one with which i carry on !


Every twinkling star in the sky is the reminder of my lost innocence
The Innocence which I know, I will see in " Myself" one day " Again"!

Some thoughts , which remind me every day that I have to move on even when everything else seems to be stand still !